You will never, ever, ever see an article on Put A Ring On It giving you tips about shedding for the wedding or slimming down for the gown.
If you’ve got health and fitness goals that coincide with what you plan on wearing on your wedding day, good on you, but if you don’t – that’s okay too. We don’t believe in pressuring women to conform to particular body shapes – and we think anyone that does this stuff is kind of a douche bag.
This tale that captivated Instagram earlier this week is a case in point. Cassie Young, a newly engaged radio presenter from Atlanta in the USA shared an exchange she had with a male personal trainer who decided to pitch getting her “in shape” after she shared her engagement.
This guy reached out to me on Twitter with a pitch, and it spiraled into something else. I’m posting this because I want every woman and man to know that it does not MATTER what you look like. (I'm blue. He's gray. Swipe to read.) You are worthy. Love is out there for you. Life is waiting with open arms. It doesn’t matter if you’re skinny or fat or between the two or willowy or broad shouldered or peer shaped or like a board or anything in between. You get good stuff in life by being YOU. That's what matters. If you think of life as a “game” with being skinny as how you “win,” this guy is offering to play by the rules and get you there. I’m telling you the game is BOGUS. You don’t need the game. I reject the game. I REFUSE TO PLAY. It’s a fake construct that you can step outside of. Your inner-value and self-worth comes from YOU, not what you look like. Who gives a f**k if you got a few extra pounds. Or ten. Or twenty. Thirty. Whatever. If you are happy and healthy, that’s ALL that matters. Those pounds DO 👏NOT 👏DEFINE 👏YOU 👏OR 👏YOUR 👏WORTH. Don’t let people like this try to convince you otherwise, because they’ll try – but it’s because they don’t understand yet. They’re caught up in the game and can’t see it for what it is. You can. Life is waiting for you. It's too short to be spent worrying about a belly roll. Go be happy and live it to your fullest.
The trainer actually said to her: ““You can accept how you look but you can’t be happy with the way you look. You can’t lie to yourself.”
What a cheek!
Cassie wasn’t having any of it, though. She clapped back:
“Your inner-value and self-worth comes from YOU, not what you look like. Who gives a f**k if you got a few extra pounds,” she wrote, “Or ten. Or twenty. Thirty. Whatever. If you are happy and healthy, that’s ALL that matters. Those pounds DO 👏NOT 👏DEFINE 👏YOU 👏OR 👏YOUR 👏WORTH. Don’t let people like this try to convince you otherwise, because they’ll try – but it’s because they don’t understand yet.”
And although she copped some nasty trolls in the process, she got a lot of love too. And posted this photo of herself looking smokin’ hot to stick it up the trolls:
👈👈👈 HATERS TO THE LEFT. I’ll be honest, yesterday the trolls got to me for a hot minute. Their comments didn’t hurt my feelings so much as stole my faith in the world. I was shocked that people could be SO cruel and SO nasty, and I wondered why we should even bother about fighting against this cold, biter, heartless Army Of The Dead. . And then you reached out. And you. And you and you and you. You told me your stories of ordering your first two piece. Your battles with eating disorders and self-acceptance. The struggle with loss in your family and weight gain because of depression and how you battle it every day, head held high. Or going into the water in a bathing suit to play with your kids and make memories for the first time instead of hiding under a beach towel. Or stories of your kids, who see the world through innocent, honest eyes, and don’t get what the problem with being overweight is (because to them there is no problem.) Or the heartbreaking stories of how you or your daughters or sisters were on the precipice, and all they needed to realize was that fat is literally just an adjective, and not a judgment on who they are as a person, and now they’re getting married. . Thank you guys. You drowned out the trolls. You checked on me to make sure I was ok. You slammed the haters and showed me the light again. Texts, Tweets, Emails, DMs, Facebook Messages. There’s not even a comparison to the level of love I have seen on the internet from @TheBertShow community – my radio family – and from absolute strangers. . If you are struggling, know we are out there. Not only the outspoken protestors, but also the silent allies. We will stand tall with you and we will win this fight. I promise you. . EVERY body is beautiful. . This photo is for you, trolls. Eat your ❤️ out. . . . #EffYourBeautyStandards #EffYourBodyStandards #MYPerfectBody #LoveYourBody #IAmWhoIAm #HatersGonnaHate #BodyPositivity #LoseHateNotWeight #LoveYourself #BodyPositivity #EverybodyIsBeautiful #HealthIsWealth #SelfLove #HonorMyCurves #CelebrateMySize #TheRealMe #BBW #SelfAcceptance #RealBeauty #IAmGoodEnough #IAmWorthy #LookWhatYouMadeMeDo #AllTheHashtagsBecauseThisIsImportant 📷: @ownboudoir
Cassie plans on marrying her man some time next year – they’ve still got to set a date.